So I’m San Fransocializing with Tantek and Greg Elin, shootin’ the breeze and considering how we c [...]

When I am traveling I often have my laptop with me, but when I am near home I most often an out with a much smaller device (Treo). My laptop is my portable office, but my Treo is my personal communication device. Increasingly, there are many occasions where I have both. As I am moving back into serious project work, my laptop is increasingly with me (but it is also my desktop – for now).

The rudeness I think correlates to whom we are interacting. If it is geek, the laptops are out and mobiles clicking. If it is not geek, I am less inclined to do so. But, I will pop out the laptop or mobile for a quick demo or to show an example. I also will pull out graph paper and illustrate.

This last trip in England I had meetings where my laptop stayed tucked away while discussing business, but also had social occasions where I found the bar had wifi and all the laptops popped out while we chatted multi-socially and drank beers. I also had business meetings where all the parties had their laptops out taking notes (to ensure everything was captured) and quick references could be checked, even with no connectivity.

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But it’s true — there’s absolutely something sacred in having one-to-one or one-to-few conversations. And I think that those conversations actually happen more often in the context of San Fransocializing.

Let me propose a clarification. It seems to me that the traditional view of geeks pegs them as smelly, socially inept dweebs, locked up in their bedrooms or basements and trolling IRC. I’m sure that actually was the reality for some time. But this new generation of geeks, hey, we like being social and being out around our friends and other people. But we also like to use our gadgets and stay connected to people who aren’t physically present.

You mentioned the backchannel as a distraction — and that if a speaker is no good, well, get up and leave. I heard this argument before and it doesn’t real hold muster. I mean, consider Les Blogs. People paid for that conference. A number of the panels were basic and not terribly challenging. Yet the backchannel discourse was humourous, engaging and personal. When there wasn’t enough intellectual fodder being tossed around on stage, we made up for it in the backchannel. Did it get out of hand? Anh, I dunno, we were thinking those thoughts anyway. And I just don’t follow the rule that “If you’ve got nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” We don’t have our vaunted Freedom of Speech for nothing.

But ok ok, so I alluded to the last point I want to make about this: more than ever, we’re able to be inclusive and rope in folks who otherwise wouldn’t be able to participate in conversations and dialogues that once were the mores of the wealthy, the elite, the sophisticated. We’re overrunning those channels with amateurs, uncooth debutantes with all the ego of a Mac truck. And sorry, but we’re not going away.

Maybe, as Mena was suggesting, we need to teach politeness in kindergarten again. I’d be for that. Kids are learning to swear before they’re potty-trained and something seems off about that. I mean, it’s just language, but hey, let’s clean up our behavior offline before we impose the manner-police on the web. At least online you can close your browser, kill IRC, junk and email or shut the damn box off. In real life, hey, you really don’t have so much control over your social environment. Get what I mean?

So there has to be an equal complement to San Fransocialhttp://www.factoryjoe.com/blog/wp-admin/post.php. And obviously, it’s San Fr [...]

While I’m a total geek, I count myself among those “others” who finds it both rude and distressing to see people multitasking when I’m communicating with them… or attempting to communicate.

When you’re in my home or having coffee with me, you damn well better turn OFF the flippin’ phone (or at least put it on vibrate), and turn OFF the laptop, unless we’re looking at pictures or listening to music TOGETHER.

And even then, frankly, I’d rather drink a cup of coffee with you and CHAT.

And by chat, I mean in person. Looking into each others’ eyes. Maybe putting a hand on each others’ shoulders for emphasis. And concentrating on each other (or, if in a group, on the group) 100%.

Hey, look, I use Trillian. I used to use IRC a bunch. I like e-mail. I’ve used Skype. And yes, I’ll admit that — somewhat hypocritically — I’ve gone to meetings on occasion and spent time checking my e-mail.

But still, there’s something sacred and IMPORTANT about in-person communications, IMHO, that demand one’s full attention.

And yes, this means I also abhor the ‘backchannel’ at conferences. Taking notes… that’s fine. But chatting with others to deride or “augment” the speaker? That’s crappy.

Boring speaker? Leave the room or hire a different speaker. If a speaker is boring enough, often enough, hopefully they won’t be asked back.

Maybe, at 34 years old, I’m just an aging old luddite… but I do tech stuff full time for a living. I like geekery. I just wish that — once it helped bring people together — that people would actually ENJOY that time with others they’re literally faced with and not feel compelled to be multitasking.